It's not unusual for TV executives to brainstorm boneheaded schemes designed to rebrand their failing channels -- schemes that often come nowhere near addressing the channel's actual problems. But you'd be hard pressed to find a scheme more desperate, more clueless, or more laughable than Sci Fi Channel's new idea to fix what ain't broke.

They've announced plans to change their name to Syfy.

Yes, "Syfy." Why, you ask? Good question. According to TVWeek, the NBC Universal-owned network has had its best year ever, ranking 13th in total viewers among ad-supported cable networks in 2008, and doubling its earnings in the fourth quarter.

So it only makes sense, then, that they need to ... change the name? And, it appears, to insult their core viewers while they're at it.

"The name Sci Fi has been associated with geeks and dysfunctional, antisocial boys in their basements with video games and stuff like that, as opposed to the general public and the female audience in particular," Tim Brooks, who helped launch Sci Fi Channel, told TVWeek. "It's somewhat cooler and better than the name 'Science Fiction.' But even the name Sci Fi is limiting."



The whole thing is a head scratcher: A sci-fi based network that's successful because it runs science fiction programming, wanting to get away from science fiction because they don't want to specialize. Besides running vast swaths of programming that isn't actually science fiction (Moonlight? Seriously?), the network's also treated fans of it star attraction, the Peabody-winning Battlestar Galactica, abominably, blaming a seven-month hiatus on the 2008 Writer's Guild strike.

What's funny about all of this (and by funny, I mean sad and really, really stupid) is that the biggest problem with Sci Fi isn't that it's called Sci Fi -- it's that the channel doesn't respect sci fi. Tune in on any given night, and you're more likely to find Leprechaun 3 or a wrestling match than anything science fiction related. Toss in reruns of everything from Stargate to Twilight Zone, and the whole channel looks less like it's programmed than that it's cobbled together from leftovers.

But don't take my word for it. Here's the justification from Dave Howe, president of Sci Fi Channel. Read the following, and then decide if this sounds like a man who has a deep, genuine love of science fiction:

"When we tested this new name, the thing that we got back from our 18-to-34 techno-savvy crowd, which is quite a lot of our audience, is actually this is how you'd text it. It made us feel much cooler, much more cutting-edge, much more hip, which was kind of bang-on what we wanted to achieve communication-wise."

Now try to not imagine him holding a ratings book in one hand, and a big sack of money in the other.

"We need an umbrella brand we can attach to new businesses: Sci Fi games, Sci Fi kid,' said Howe. "It does no use to attach 'Sci Fi' because there's hundreds of sci-fi Web sites and sci-fi publications. So it's changing your name without changing your name."

Look, when a network prides itself on dreck like the "Sci Fi Originals" Snakehead Terror and Supergator, a change of name isn't the problem. The problem that needs solving is the executives who've taken millions of science-fiction fans for a 16-year ride, dangling the promise of quality programming while delivering X-Files reruns and Mansquito.

"Syfy." Really, Mr. Howe? Really?