I can't even crack a joke about this picture. It scares the crap out of me -- those dark eyes are hypnotizing me, freezing my very soul. I don't even want to talk about it, but I have to. Universal has just sent us this hi-res photo (click to enlarge), which comes by way of USA Today and possibly my nightmares.

They have kept the basic design, director Brad Siberling says he fought to keep their original humanoid shape -- and to keep the kitschy appeal of a man in a suit. "There is a sense of humor that I loved from the original show that can only come from an actor trying to negotiate the suit. If it became CG, they'd be too perfect. For the Sleestak to remain in people's memories, it tells you that it was about who was in the suit."

The one difference is that the Sleestaks will not be armed with crossbows, as in the original television show. Instead, they'll pull quills from their spines and fire them like arrows. Murderous lizards are funny.

The Land of the Lost remake is scheduled to be released July 17th, 2009.